nature_loving_queer: (What?)
nature_loving_queer ([personal profile] nature_loving_queer) wrote2010-10-03 07:57 pm

Free Writing

Have you ever sat on the floor of the shower and just stayed there?

Have you ever slid down the wall of the shower because it takes too much strength to stand, strength you don't have?

Just sat there, legs tucked into your chest, arms wrapped around your legs, water droplets dripping from your hair onto your face?

Just stared, just existed?

Have you ever felt that numb?

Numb enough that you just sit on the floor of a shower, staring at a door, crying?

Sometimes I don't even have the strength to cry, I'll just repeat something, a word that has meaning, more meaning than my existence does right then. I hate that feeling, I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone, and I hope with all my body and soul that you have never felt that way.